It was the tree I fell in love with. Beautiful blooms of purple flowers popping out at the start of summer. We bought our home just months before, in the dead of winter, and the delicate petals were a pleasant surprise as I wondered what would appear once summer arrived.
Fast-forward to the summer of 2020. I anxiously awaited my beautiful purple flowers to burst forward. After such a depressing spring with Covid-19 fears and stress, I wanted to witness the elegant arrival of something familiar. Something to make my heart smile and bring some sort of normalcy to the chaos of this year.
I waited. And waited. And waited. By the end of June my tree still looked the same it did in January. Weeks later some sense of life starting budding. A little green here and there, but something was off. Only one side of my tree was showing life. The other side remained dead as the winter’s night.
Half dead, half alive. Something hit the core of my beautiful tree cutting off life to one side. It’s sad knowing a once thriving tree, will now have to be uprooted and torn down.
Half dead, half alive. Do you ever feel that way? Has something hit the core of your existence that’s causing part of you to wither away?
“But he said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness’. Therefore, I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.” 2 Corinthians 12: 9-10
To delight in weakness, insults, hardships, persecutions and difficulties. Who had that as part of their 2020 resolutions? I’m guessing not many of us.
If we look at the context around the verse, Paul says all of the weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions and difficulties were allowed by the Lord to “to keep me from becoming conceited" (2 Corinthians 12:7b).
I don’t know about you, but I’m exhausted. I’m tired. I’m weak. I feel like I’m about to break just like those dead tree limbs in my front lawn. I have to wonder if the Lord is allowing me to break down so He can break off those “dead” parts of my life. The parts of my life that make me feel strong, without relying on His strength. The priorities in my life that don’t align with His kingdom.
The Lord knew what 2020 would bring. Covid-19, social injustice, protests, tensions and the dividing body of Christ during an election year. None of this is shocking Him off His throne. He is still the great I AM. He is still Lord of all.
We are the ones who are dying when new layers of tension and uncertainty blanket us. We are the ones whose limbs are barren because we’ve cut off the only source of life to allow fruit to bloom. The almighty grace of Jesus Christ. The leave-it-all here, follow you no matter what attitude. No. Matter. What.
The Lord allows His children to go through pain. That’s shown throughout scripture. It’s what we choose to do with it that will make the difference. Will we cut off the source? Or, cling to the one who carried the cross to save our souls? As is written in Deuteronomy 33:12, “Let the beloved of the Lord rest secure in Him, for He shields him all day long”
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